Dee Quits
by SimplySpectating
Summary: After a crazy New Years Party at the pub Dee realizes she doesn't want to be the odd one out all of the time. When she leaves will the guys believe that maybe this time she's not joking around, or will they lose the person who always passes them beers?
1. The Guys Get Waisted

Everyone knows that I don't own this awesome show, or any of the shows I'll be writing about…. So I hope to never have to write a Disclaimer ever again. . .peace.

Dee POV

"YOU!" Dennis fell of the bar stool and and stumbled back to his feet, "Are the most attractive woman I have ever laid my eyes on. You, Me Men's room?"

"Dennis I'm your sister!" What an asshole. I knew the moment I came into work I could only have a beer or two, the brainiacs had already been drinking before I even got here, and just as I suspected Dennis let alone Mac and Charlie would be able to get home okay. FUCK, I should be the one on the floor too drunk to feel feelings anymore. . .I should help Charlie up soon. . .maybe later.

"I don't caaaare if you're…you're…"

"Frank?' Mac cut in as he stumbled up behind Dennis "Beer me birdie." I handed him one, I know I shouldn't though.

"No, no" "Tyra Banks?" "Not her" "Frank" he chugged his off brand beer down

"Thaat's It! I don't care if you're Frank, I. .I love you Dee…"

"OKAY That's IT, you're creepin me out! I'm cutting you off!" I pried his scotch out of hand, he actually put up a fight.

"COME OOOOOOOON! It's New Years! Live A Little!"

"Wish I could Asshole, But I think you're drunk enough for everyone in the bar." It's Actually Crowded for once, but I guess on new years everyone just tries their hardest to get drunk and forget that another year of their lives got waisted away being treated like trash by their coworkers and left as the punch line to all their jokes. . .well, it can't just be her. She couldn't get drunk now, someone would have to tell the sorry if something ever comes up again. . .Halloween sucked.

"Beer me!" How had he already finished that last one? Mac Definitely can't feel feelings anymore.

"NO More! It's almost two! We need to start sending people home, clear out the bar. We have to go home, I need to go home! I Need To Get Drunk!" As soon As I got home it was straight to the Champaign And re-runs Of the ball drop.

"EEEHHH! We'll just crash at youre place tonight!" His face said Flawless logic. He pushed Dennis over but he just plopped down to the floor.

"Well! As great as that plan sounds, the last time I had each one of you all in my house at once I had five thousand dollars worth of property damage, and an additional two thousand dollars worth exterminator costs because Frank and Charlie let eight cats loose in my walls! Oh! And lets not forget that I broke My wrist because I later got stuck in the wall trying to get the cats!"

Fuck I really hate these guys! Just remembering that makes me want to kick their asses! I've got jerk Numero Uno standing right in front of me, I should! He's so drunk he wouldn't feel till tomorrow, fight back, and wouldn't remember it the next day!

" Now that I think about it yeah, Dennis and I are probly gonna have two smokin hotties on are arms in a few minutes cause we're gonna take off."

I don't think the buddy system we talked about worked out very well. Like I knew it wasn't. Dennis and Mac were supposed to drink only to the point where one of them would be the eyes and the other the legs. Charlie and Frank were gonna. .okay Charlie was going to stay sober enough to get them both home. That wasn't happening, especially with Charlie and Dennis Playing mouse othe floor and Frank. . .Frank?

"Where the fuck's Frank!" I tried to raise my self above the counter to look around the bar, I just realized that I hadn't seen the son-of-a-bitch all night.

"Oh, that girl walked out of here, I'd say fiiiive. . .yeah fiive hours ago." He nodded his head, but I don't think he realized. "Eh, but don't worry I'm pretty sure he had like eight beers before hand! So he's good!"

"That Makes Me Feel Great! You know what!" I walked over to the mega-phone Dennis puts out on holidays, so when he thinks he has a good idea he can tell the whole bar. I got up on the counter.

"ATTENTION ALL DRUNKS AND SOBER FRIENDS OF THE DRUNKS!" At least there was now a use for this stupid thing, "PATTY'S PUB IS NOW CLOSING, WE NEED YOU TO LEAVE NOW!"

"Dee You Can't just be rude like that!" Mac jumps up to the counter and pulls the mega-phone from my hands, " SORRY BOUT THIS BUZzZ KILL GUYS, BUT IT'S CLOSING TIME, AND I'M AFRAID THE PARTY MUST END!", He put the mega-phone down, "See? That's a much better way of getting rid of the crowd! Rude."

"HHAAAWW!" I gasped, he just fell off he counter.


	2. Dee's annoyed

God I love Writing!

DeePOV

"COME THE FUCK ON CHARLIE!" Dennis has his arm around my shoulder, I have to hold him up considering he can't stand by himself.

"I don't wannaaaaaa!" He's leaning against the wall of his apartment hallway, we're only three rooms away from his! Why can't he just not be a baby for once and do what I say. . .well, I got him close enough at least. Thankfully Mac can stand on his own.

"Fine! Do whatever you want Charlie!" "MOOOOMMYYYYYY!" He started rolling on the floor. . again.

Just walk away, just walk away. You've successfully completed phase one: drop off Charlie. It was now time for phase two: Drop off dumb (Dennis) and retarded (Mac). I looked down at Charlie, He was now Asleep, sucking his thumb, what a big baby. They are all babies!

(Place change)

"Mac Open The Door." Kinda hard when you're supporting your sleeping brother on your back. He fumbled with the door

"It's locked." "Unlock It!" The Vein On my head I was too young to have was about to pop.

"Fine!" He Put his hands in his front pockets, then his back pockets, I was getting worried until

"Theeeeere We Go!" He Pulled it out, It didn't show as much as my brother but you could tell just how drunk he was cause he gets louder, I mean MUCH louder when he was drunk, and every other word for this guy grew with volume when he spoke. He also apparently lost motor skills because he couldn't get the key in the lock. . Then he dropped the key, "Fuck."

"Will you just take him and I'll do it!" My volume grew because of the rage these guys were giving me. He tried taking him but they both just ended up on the floor. I picked up the key and opened the door, "After You!" I Held the door open so Mac could bring Dennis in. He stood up, grabbed Dennis by the Arms and dragged him in.

I was about to leave when I turn my head to look at them one last time. Mac was passed out on the couch, Dennis was on the rug by the couch, Mac apparently hadn't planned on putting him in bed.

I chuckled "Night Guys." I lock the door behind me.

(place change)

Finally home! The moment I've been waiting for all day. What do I have to do now? Oh yeah, Feed Mickey (my hamster), and check my email.

she walked over to her little friend, what a cutie! It had red eyes though, The guys don't know about him cause then they'd want to see him, then Charlie'd kill it because it has red eyes, she could see the whole event play out in her head, and she wasn't losing another animal because of them. She filled his bowl and changed the water.

She sat on front of her tv with reruns of the ball drop on, and her laptop on her lap, three new messages. Message one. . ."God dammit Mac!"

_I was going through your drawers wednesday looking for a bra so Charlie and I could have sling shot battles, and I found your vibrator, don't expect it back, Oh and I know you can't be that stretched out cause you never get action! Ps I also took one of your bras_

Message two, junk! Message three. . .from ?

_Hello Miss Deandra Reynolds, this is Danny Thomms, New Owner of the night club DYNO-MighT. We've been watching local Philly bars looking for talented bartenders to take us in a new direction of night clubs. We've had a scout point out your talent to us and would like to offer you an interview and audition. If interested please reply within 20 days._

'The fuck? Me? A good bartender? I Thought I was the only one who thought I was a good bartender, and I can even admit I do a half-ass job most of the time. Judging by the name it sounds like they pay a lot. . .but I work at Paddy's.' her face scrunched."

With a sigh she turned off the tv and went to bed.

'I haven't had one drink today. . .' the thought surprised her, then she fell asleep.


End file.
